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DISCOS AND OUR CHILDREN
So many parents ask nowadays: “What
do our children see in discos, where
the noise is such, any conversation
becomes impossible? What is there to
enjoy?
The ones who remember when the
rock-n’roll first appeared,
scandalizing the older generation
because of the free style dancing,
learned to accept the new trend the
same way they quietly compromised in
order to live with the TV and the
stereo at the highest volume. Others,
point out the universality of
discos—with reference to place and
age—since they attract more than
teenagers and seem to exert great
influence in fashion and attitudes.
If you go a step ahead and look
deeper, beyond the gestures and
faces of joy, one philosophical
conclusion is also a common sense
observation: again, people don’t
find it easy to communicate. To
dance comes more naturally to them
than to undertake listening to is
the loud music, the rythmn they show
interest in listening to is the loud
music, the rythmn the cherish and
obey without questioning, hour after
hour.
Contrasting with ballroom dance,
every person there is really on his/her
own. Nobody supposedly needs a
partner, not even singles… (Don’t we
all know it is not easy to be a
partner?) In a Disco, there seems to
be no need to pay attention to
others, no requirement for the
co-ordination of movements and steps
to someone else’s.
A positive outlook at discos
acknowledges the fun and recreation,
a combination of individual and
group activity, a social form of
self-expression. These aspects
should not be undermined—or ignored—by
concerned families. Maybe acceptance
will come easier if we remind
ourselves about the wonderful
exercise our youth is practicing
with such a consistent enthusiasm.
This much needed release of energy
which has many beneficial results,
physical as well as emotional,
requires no coaching or nagging from
adults.
At the same time, there is some
discipline involved. Disco dancing
always calls for an audience.
Individual preferences may determine
personal styles but the group still
maintains its control since each
dancer needs the right atmosphere.
It must include “the others”, who
share the same feelings and
reaction-response to the music and
place. Thus, the human need to
establish some basic rules of
personal communication appears at
discos too. Despite its disguise of
individuality, communication can be
easily spotted, dancing or at
relaxation times when most of the
body rests but eyes keep following
the movements of the others still on
the go. Quiet or not, each person is
bound to interact while accepting
his/her limitations to the space
available individually. So, respect
for other people’s rights is there
and only this should be enough
reason to invite a parent’s praise.
As long as we realize we are not
ever alone in life, our chances of
emotional balance seems very good.
It does not really matter if some
relationships will have to be
classified as superficial, temporary,
indifferent or disliked by us. In a
public place, we just have to behave
in a civilized way … learning to
live in a society means different
individuals are called to express
their preferences in a context which
does not conflict with the goals of
the community.
Let’s concentrate then on these
positive aspects of discos.
Specially for teenagers, it is just
wonderful to be where they know to
behave, what to say and to do, etc.
Did we forget how insecure we were
as adolescents, unless we found
ourselves with our peers? Sometimes,
a nostalgic look at the past brings
mature, tolerant thoughts.
Talking in more practical terms, we
suggest families occasionally join
the fun. Next time the kids leave
for a disco, just ask to which one
are they going. Then, as soon as
they are out, choose a similar
dancing spot and go there….. Why not?
Is is also the most fashionable,
less boring way of loosing weight.
Later, tell your children it was
great.
Maybe, after one or three nights,
followed by spontaneous talks and
commentaries the next day, the “old”
folks will get a warm invitation
from the kids to see “their”
favorite disco place.
In any case, we foresee a
communication bridge being built,
from a very basic, essential
starting point: a first hand
knowledge of young people’s
feelings.
BUT BE ALERT, ALWAYS, for ANY
DANGEROUS SITUATION (VIOLENCE, DRUGS,
etc.)! AND TALK, GO ON TALKING WITH
YOUR CHILDREN! THIS HELPS TO KEEP
THEM SAFE AND HEALTHY.
Later, they will be very thankful to
you.
Theresa Catharina de Góes Campos
Ottawa, Ontario - Canada |
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